Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Having a Son

I was the mother of two daughters when I gave birth to my son, but I'd grown up with brothers, so I thought I was prepared.

I was wrong.

I should have had a clue that he was going to be a tad bit more difficult when I recalled my brothers' youths...but I remembered my brothers from a sister's perspective, and just remembered they were pains and not much else.

But even without that, I should have guessed he was going to be difficult when two years went by without him sleeping even one time through the night. Not once. Still, I blithely assumed once he slept through the night, I had it made.

Now he's a teen and I realize I was wrong. I haven't seen his bedroom floor in months. I can't remember what color the carpet is. I walk by his bedroom and can't resist sneaking a peak, hoping the floor has miraculously reappeared, but no. I found the shirt I remember him wearing on Christmas, two months of clothes from the pizza shop he works at, shoes, ski equipment, and last summer's golf equipment. But no carpet. Oh, and there's wrappers from the Easter candy his aunt sent over...or maybe they're wrappers from Halloween. Who knows.

Gently, I close the door and wonder what color the carpet is. He's going away to college in a few short months, and I know I'll find the carpet then. His younger sister is jonesing over the room and can't wait until he moves out so she can move in. She'll find the carpet and tell me what color it is. And she'll feel the walls need painted to coordinate, and she'll probably need new bedding and accessories.

Boys are different than girls. They don't care about what color the carpet is, or the walls for that matter. My son might drive me crazy...but I'm going to miss him like crazy when he goes. No one to watch geeky shows with, no one who'll eat whatever I cook and think it's good. He's grown. My job is done. Now when he doesn't sleep a night through, it's by choice, because he is a night owl, and he no longer needs me to stay up with him. He graduates at the end of this month, then leaves for Europe with his oldest sister. A few months later, he leaves for college.

Yes, boys are different than girls. And as much as I long to know what color that bedroom carpet is, I know I'm going to miss mine like crazy.



  1. Holly I understand what you are talking about, I know we complain about what the kids don't do but let them leave and we are a mess my youngest went to Canada last summer for a month and I was a mess, I know I complained about what she would not do but then we she was gone I was lost. You care less about the carpet as long and he would stay, but we all know that can't happen. I have one moving out this year and the other two are supposed to move too. I will really be lost with everything that has happened this year I am not ready for all of this. I am sure our phones will be ringing off the wall. We will have to keep up with each other maybe that will help knowing we are not the only ones dealing with it all.

    It is nice to be back blogging.

  2. My experience was just the opposite, thugh I had two daughters when my son was born, as well. My daughters fought over clothes and everything imaginable, and the room they shared was a pig pen. My son, when he was old enough, did his own laundry once a wekk and kept his room neat and tidy--even his pet cages. Last daugjter had come along by then, and she was a slob, too. Go figure.

  3. Mickey, I'm sorry your nest is emptying. It's so hard being torn...thrilled they're growing up, and yet it's bittersweet! Hope you find fun ways to fill your free time. My dh and I are talking about pottery classes. The kids laugh in a mom-and-dad-are-so-crazy sort of way, but it sounds like fun!

    Cher, I had one daughter who was rather piggy, but the other two are neat-freaks. As a neat-freak myself, I get that. It's the non-carpet ones who boggle me!