Hollyworld: Caregiving

Wednesday, March 03, 2021

Caregiving

Something Blue's Hank was a very difficult character for me to write. He's got dementia. It's early in the process, but he is losing pieces of himself slowly. Dementia and Alzheimers are such awful, hard processes. They're the long goodbye. I was my grandmother's caregiver for years and watched her lose pieces of herself, bit by bit. I watched the vibrant, force of nature who was my grandmother disappear leaving just a shadow of herself. I later cared for a neighbor with dementia as well.

I really work to write honest—albeit optimistic—stories and I tried to bring a sense of honesty to Hank's character and the people who love him. And I hope that people realize that as awful as the disease is, there are moments of mercy. Even at her worst, my grandmother knew we were hers. She couldn't name us, but she recognized us. I could talk about things in her past and she'd respond. The same thing with my neighbor. My kids grew up taking care of my grandmother. My minions did the same with our neighbor. We visited frequently. For years she lived on the other side of town, but her last few years, she lived in a home within walking distance. Every week, the minions would suit up in one of their superhero outfits and ride their scooters (you can't ride a bike with a cape) to visit. They high-fived and chatted with a lot of residents. And when we got to our neighbor's room, she knew we were hers. When people asked about our May-December friendship, I had a simple explanation. I was like a fungus. She caught me and couldn't get rid of me. That friendship is also a part of Something Blue. Hank has a much younger friend who becomes close to him. Lily's his fungus.

Caregiving is a gift. It's hard, but the rewards are plentiful. I think my kids grew up better for caring for my grandmother, and I think the minions' lives were enriched as well.

I love writing a variety of characters. No matter their age or other specifics, they become friends. This book in particular feels like...well, home. I hope you find that in the entire Hometown Hearts series—a sense of home.

Thanks everyone for the support!

Holly

Here are links to the whole Hometown Hearts series!

Hometown Hearts: